#and don't hmu ever the fuck again.

[snekdood]

iunno, personally, i think, if you make plans to hangout with someone... and you know they're disabled and cant drive... and you can easily drive and pick them up... there's no excuse not to..? im sorry bitch, you want me to lyft over to your bf's house which is what like not even a mile away? didn't realize it was such a chore to be helpful, lord.

[quarks-pussy]

So I know we here at Startrekfandom love that "came back wrong but from the pov of the wrong" thing and apply it to many different characters and canon situations and I am far from trying to complain about it (I'm "came out wrong" trope myself so I was always gonna obsess over it) but having recently watched a very important episode (you'll know which one) for the first time I think there's a character who hits both tropes mentioned but llike, intertwined, opposite and subverted, and whom I wanna talk about.

Julian Bashir.

From his parents' pov he's "came out wrong but we got him help and he came back better" while from his own pov it's "came out 'insufficient', was destroyed for it, came back wrong and only later slowly came to terms with his new self tho never the process (justifiably so)" and it's heartbreaking because in a way, he's right! Jules Bashir died! His parents had an intellectually disabled child and decided to eugenics him! Julian is not the person he used to be and while I do love the person he is now, that doesn't bring back who he was! Part of me wishes we could've gotten to see Jules at least once and part of me hopes we never do because my heart would shatter.

This isn't a good comparison but nonetheless one I can't help drawing: it's giving similar vibes to anti-vaxxers. "I'd rather risk having a child who is dead than one who's autistic". Obviously this doesn't map over since Julian is still autistic and the procedure his parents subjected him to specifically targeted his intellectual disability and if any folks with id wanna comment on this I definitely recommend you listen to them over me, but it's a similarity I, as an autistic who has encountered anti-vaxxers again and again, can't help but point out. "Give me a normal child or give them death."

This may have been written about already but there needs to be stories about teenage Julian (after finding out and rediscovering who he was) practicing some good ol' recognition of the self through media. I need to hear about how he would encounter a story about someone who came back wrong (I'm gonna assume there's plenty of "wrong" pov stories floating around by the 24th century) and absolutely weep. I need to see Julian mourning Jules, taking years and years to process his feelings, experiencing guilt about how he, the imposter, didn't deserve to live Jules' life.

Came back wrong from the returned's pov but it wasn't an accident. It was done to you deliberately by the people who claim to love you. And now you are here, piloting the corpse of your predecessor.

Jules Bashir is dead. Long live Julian Bashir.

[saraminia]

Oh, you want to know what I'm thinking about? Well thanks for asking! Well hell, enough of the crying already (she lied like a lying liar). Yeah yeah, I love him, we've all heard that now many times over. So enough about that. It's time I live up to my blog description. So let's restart the horny posting. I once said on here that he looks like he gives good head and I stand by that statement and I haven't been able to stop thinking about that for several hours (days? months? years?). God what I wouldn't give to get that face buried between my legs. I think the moment our eyes locked when I met him, and I started buffering (I think my brain was rebooting, the earth shifted off it's axis, time stopped for a few seconds etc.), the only thought ping-ponging around like a pinball in my head was "can I sit on your face". Luckily what came out of my mouth, while still embarrassing, was not that. Don't worry, I was very respectful. I'm not a total swamp goblin. What I said was "it's so nice to see you" 🤦🏻‍♀️😭🤡 I froze okay! I couldn't very well say what I was actually thinking! Anyway, back to my point. What was my point? Oh yeah, eating pussy. So that's what I'm thinking about once again. This time I'm not thinking about doing it but being on the receiving end of said activity. Or not even that really. I'm just thinking about him doing it. I believe cunnilingus is something this man is very good at and will continue to believe so until I'm proven otherwise. He just has that face and that disposition. He seems like a pleaser. He'd want you to enjoy yourself and would be willing to make sure that happens. Anyway, thanks for coming to my Ted talk. Next time we might be talking about those pianist fingers of his or maybe about his huge *a truck runs over me*

[hai7ani]

cocky motherfucker Rindou who works at Murasaki Sports that loves annoying you whenever you come by the store. he's a bit of a jerk with the way he acts, but still gives you staff discounts at checkout and a free sticker whenever you pop by because you once brought along your laptop while shopping and it had many weird alien, cat stickers on the cover. he recommends you a specific skateboard and he makes you buy it afterwards, claiming it's for making him waste saliva on explaining boards to a non-skater, but sets it up for free anyway and tells you the best spots to skate in the city. the board's not even for you anyway 一 you meant to buy it as a gift for your skater cousin, but okay, thanks, you'll pass along the message to your cousin, you guess... (you started skating ever since that day and gifted your cousin a pair of socks from New Era instead.)

you don't even know him that well 一 he's a friend of a friend of a friend from high school and you'd only met him once properly at a club party about a year ago when he accidentally got beer all over your shirt and threw you his expensive Carhartt jacket before running away. and then he somehow manages to befriend your BeReal later that night, reacts the middle finger to every post you make and you'll react it right back at him with a pissed off look on your face. he comments stuff like 'shit music' and 'u need a better playlist, hmu' when he sees whatever song you've been listening to when you take a BeReal but is always the first one to react to them.

he's still kind of sweet though. likes rapping along to whatever's playing on the speakers in store (you don't like to admit it, but you must say, he does have great music taste as he claims), but you'll always catch him twisting the volume knob to the left even though KOHH is playing whenever you come by to replace your wheels (of the skateboard he made you buy) or shop for a new cap and he's so cocky about it every time too. one time he made you wait for him about 15 minutes to close up the store and you expected to walk together to the train station until he turns the other direction and you hear beeping followed by car doors unlocking. "aren't you dumbass getting in?" he's already one foot in his car (a fucking Nissan GTR) with his left brow raised when you turned around 'cause you thought he disappeared into thin air and then stare at him dumbfounded as he starts the engine. ?????

he visits you at your own store (literally just opposite of Murasaki Sports) whenever you're in during his break and annoys the hell out of you. you sell phone cases and he likes trying on every single one he picks up only to never buy them and places them about 6° to the left that he knows make your skin crawl from the asymmetric position, but you'll catch him helping you tidy up the other out-of-place on-display phone cases and greet random customers that come in, as if he is the one working here and not you, and then only he tosses you either a Pocari or a Cola as a refreshment when he's gotta get back to work. he gives you (forces you to let him give you) a ride back home whenever your timing matches and'll quietly make sure the A/C isn't facing your face when you accidentally fall asleep in the passenger, but tells you to never sit in his car again 'cause he claims you get hair all over his seat and the sand-trapping mat below. ("y'all ladies and your hair-fall problem...")

one time your father caught the two of you bickering in the car over who's bar of Snickers it was but to him it looked like the two of you were kissing because of a perspective problem and he got so damn flustered. simply stepped into your home with his shoes on, scurrying after your old man to explain that nothing ever happened and then fist bumps your dog on the head who actually hates him like crazy, but doesn't bark at him this time. your mother makes him stay for dinner that night and you think that maybe he isn't so bad after all 一 as your best friend once suggested 一 when he makes your mother laugh like crazy (you realise then that he's a smooth talker with the elders) over dinner and your father starts asking him about sports attire because he's been wanting to get into jogging. but he keeps stepping on your toe under the table and you think he's deliberately annoying you but really, he just wanted to make you make your mother stop feeding him shrimp (he's allergic.)

[srvbryn]

Luke Castellan. Moonlight

Luke Castellan X Hades!Daughter!Reader

FLUFF <333

Summary: "we're running in the moonlight, can you show me the way again?" In which Luke fucking Castellan somehow managed to make you fall in love even more with him (ts doesn't make sense btw 😭)

A/n: GOSHH I love him sm<33 can we ignore whatever he did in the books aaaaa & CHARLIE BUSHNELL is perfect 100% I'm so desperate if you look like Charlie Bushnell hmu 🥹🥹

The moon hung low in the night sky, casting a silver glow over the beach as Luke Castellan slipped away from Hermes Cabin.

His mischievous grin was illuminated by the moonlight, and he sought the company of a specific person - (Name), Hades forbidden daughter.

As he approached (Name)'s cabin, the shadows seemed to illuminated around him, concealing his movements.

Knocking softly, he waited for (Name) to open the door, her demeanour reserved and cool, a trait inherited from her godly lineage.

"Hey there, (Name)," Luke greeted, a glimmer of excitement in his eyes. "Mind taking a stroll with me? The beach is calling."

(Name) hesitated, her shy nature evident, but curiosity sparkled in her eyes. "Sure, Castellan. Just for a little while."

Avoiding watchful eyes, until they reached the shoreline.

The sound of waves crashing against the shore filled the air as they found a secluded spot, away from prying eyes.

Luke interrupted the silence. "Wonderful night, isn't it? The moonlight reflects off the water like diamonds."

(Name) nodded, "It's... nice."

As they walked along the shore, "There's something mysterious about you."

A faint blush tinged (Name)'s cheeks. "Being Hades daughter tends to make people wary."

Luke chuckled. "Well, they don't know what they're missing. I find it intriguing."

(Name) shot him a quizzical look. "You do?"

"Absolutely. You've got this aura, but I think there's more to you than meets the eye."

They continued walking in companionable silence until Luke abruptly paused, his gaze fixed on the stars. "Hey, (Name), have you ever wished upon a star?"

(Name) shook her head. "Not really. Why?"

"I heard that wishes made under moonlit skies are more likely to come true," he replied, a playful glint in his eyes.

(Name) smirked slightly, a rare expression for her. "I doubt that."

"Care to test it out?" Luke grinned, taking (Name)'s hand gently. "Close your eyes and make a wish."

As (Name) closed her eyes, a genuine smile played on Luke's lips. "I wish for (Name) to open up, to let people see the warmth hidden beneath that exterior."

When (Name) opened her eyes, Luke's gaze softened. "Well, did it work?"

(Name) blushed, avoiding eye contact. "Maybe a little."

They resumed their walk, the atmosphere lighter. As the night wore on, they found themselves sitting on the sand, staring at the moonlit waves.

Luke turned to (Name), his expression earnest. "You know, (Name), I'm glad I sneaked out tonight."

(Name)'s cheeks flushed again, but this time, it was accompanied by a genuine smile. "Thank you, Luke. I enjoyed tonight."

Luke grinned, his mischief returning. "Well, maybe we should sneak out more often."

The air between Luke and (Name) crackled with an unspoken tension as they sat by the beach.

Luke turned to (Name), his eyes searching hers. "You know, sometimes words aren't necessary."

(Name) met his gaze, a hint of uncertainty in her eyes. "What do you mean?"

Without answering, Luke closed the distance, his lips brushing against hers in a soft, lingering kiss. The world seemed to pause for that stolen moment.

As they pulled away, (Name) looked at him, her cheeks flushed. "Luke..."

He grinned, the spark returning to his eyes. "Some things are better felt than said."

A small smile played on (Name)'s lips. "I never expected this."

"Life's full of surprises," Luke replied, his tone sincere. "And this? This was a pleasant one."

They sat in a comfortable silence, the light casting a gentle glow over their intertwined fingers. Luke couldn't help but break the quiet. "Who would've thought the daughter of Hades could be so enchanting?"

(Name) rolled her eyes but couldn't hide the smile tugging at her lips. "Flattery won't get you far, Castellan."

He chuckled. "Maybe not, but it's worth a shot."

[ivymarquis]

Steel Magnolia

Ch 1| I don't mix business and pleasure

Pairing| Soap x Honey Rating| Eventual Smut Word Count| 1.4k Content/Warnings| The author is an American attempting to write a Scottish accent (I'm still dialing it in, RIP. If any of my readers are Scottish and wanna beta hmu lmao). Honey is one of those Reader/OC hybrid characters where it is established she is a southern American, plus sized nurse who is on the shorter side but has no other physical descriptors and should read as POC friendly (if I miss something, lemme know!) I have been wanting to write this for a hot minute and always was going to have the dialogue "I'm going to marry her", so seeing @glitterypirateduck have "I'm going to marry you" as one of the prompt options for Soap It Up pretty much solidified that I needed to have my first chapter for Steel Magnolia line up for the challenge!

This chapter is SFW but I am an MDNI account

Soap has an ever mounting suspicion that these blood drives are just an excuse to give the baby nurses more practice sticking people.

Like many in the military, he doesn’t consider himself a hard stick. All the time in the gym paired with a routine schedule on base, he and many other soldiers typically get nurses drooling over his veins like the weird little vampires that they are.

Lucky him- he’s got one of the FNGs, a skittish mess who seems terrified if he looks at her too long even though she’s the one with the damn 17g needle and he’s the one that’s got to sit there and take it.

A group of soldiers on the way out had been bitching and moaning about how the charge nurse was a raging cunt, and given how those soldiers were Americans, that has a bit more teeth to it than coming from someone more local. 

He’s not entirely positive which one of the nurses is the alleged fire breathing dragon, but it’s fairly obvious which are the more senior nurses. Which only further reinforces his suspicions about being used as a pin cushion.

Soap’s a model patient as she scrubs his arm with the antiseptic. Even though he’s had worse happen in the line of duty, he still isn’t a fan of having a needle shoved into his arm. 

He sits like a statue as she ties the tourniquet around his arm. Takes a sharp inhale and lets it out as she goes to stick him.

There’s no flashback, and the needle bites. 

Fucking great. 

He and the FNG both stare at the butterfly like the flashback will magically appear, Soap flexing his fingers in an attempt to alleviate the discomfort in his arm despite the logical part of his brain knowing that’s not how it works. 

What the hell. 

“‘S supposed to be stinging like that, nurse?” He asks, really as a prompt to make her do something to reposition the needle. He’s mindful of his tone. 

The FNG blanches, like his words have dragged her back to the world of the living. She pulls the needle back before advancing forward again.

Nothing, again, but the bite from the needle stings even worse this time and he doesn’t totally manage to stifle the pained hiss that escapes.

Her nerves seem totally shot at this point, like she’s bracing for Soap to snap at her before turning in search of one of the more experienced nurses (which, in his defense, Soap does not believe he’s done anything to warrant that response). “Honey? Can I borrow you for a second?”

The nurse in question turns her head at the sound of her name and suddenly Soap is not at all concerned about the sting in his arm.

He can’t help that he’s got a type and it’s impossible to miss how she checks all the boxes appearance wise. He’s always been a sucker for a pretty face and a wide ass; given that Honey had been facing away from them, he’s got an excellent view of both when she reacts to her name being called. What can he say? He’s always had a soft spot for big soft girls 

As she strides towards Soap and the FNG, he can tell by the look on her face that she’s already trying to judge the situation.

Maybe this is the nurse that got the American soldiers riled up (perhaps they had riled her up by snapping at the skittish FNG- all conjecture, but seems plausible enough to him). She’s more than welcome to give Soap that sharp eyed, cutting expression whenever. 

Christ he hasn’t even said a word to her and he’s already got it bad.

“What’s up?” Honey asks and Soap thinks he hears a southern drawl but the two words aren’t entirely enough to confirm that theory. Definitely American though. 

“His vein keeps rolling and I can’t get it. I don’t want to go fishing, can you get it?”

“Well I can always try,” she answers before reaching up for the station behind them for sanitizer and gloves. Definitely southern. 

“Scooch,” she kindly instructs the FNG before stepping into her place beside Soap.

He knows he’s staring (there’s also a part of him keyed in to the fact that Ghost is watching from the next chair over) and he needs to act like a normal fucking person. 

“I’m Honey, I’m one of the nurses. Let’s see if we can’t get this needle where it’s supposed to be, hm?” She introduces herself before feeling on his arm, the FNG hovering over her. 

“Sounds like a plan tae me, bonnie,” Soap says, deciding immediately that he could happily listen to her talk for hours. 

Her attention shifts to the FNG, and given how she’s got a hold of the wings of the needle he decides to let her work in peace. 

“See how I've got these fingers placed like this? You wanna make sure you’ve got it anchored good so it doesn’t roll on ya,” she instructs while positioning herself. 

“Then we’ll just pull back and adjust the angle real quick and-“ To her credit, he can barely feel the needle moving as she slides the bevel right where it's supposed to be, “there. Good flashback. Check it and hook him up.”

Clearly she managed to get the needle placed as his blood damn near shoots down the tubing when they let up on the twist to check it. 

“Alrighty then,” she pauses, eyes flicking to where his name is on the screen before reading it out, “Sergeant MacTavish, you are ready to roll.”

He decides immediately he likes hearing her say his name and wants to hear it again. 

“My friends call me Soap,” he informs her, sensing she’s likely going to wander off and wanting to continue the conversation.

The snort that escapes her is adorable. “How on earth did you end up with that as a nickname?”

It’s a question he often gets when he introduces himself. Soap is such a funny name and it’s all fun and games until he tells people “It’s cause Ah clean house.”

Of course, he’s learned to be very deliberate in how he announces that tidbit, and he’s mindful of it now. Gotta be careful when pointing out that he’s good at eliminating an obstacle. Usually giving his best smile and a disproportionately bright tone helps deflect from the implication of his answer. 

Her expression quickly morphs to one of fair enough, although he’s still not quite ready to end the conversation and prompts her to keep talking. 

“Assumin’ Honey’s not yer government name, how’d ye get that for a nickname?”

One of her eyebrows quirks up, and Soap finds himself holding his breath as she’s obviously assessing him. But he knows he’s a good looking fellow so naturally assumes she’s impressed with what she sees. 

“Depends who you ask,” she answers cryptically. “Some will tell you it’s because I'm so sweet when the mood strikes,” Steaming Jesus he really could listen to her drawl for hours “and others will tell you it’s short for honeybadger. Depends on how I’m feeling, really.”

Welp, that’s it. He’s officially in love.

The FNG has him hooked and going as his blood drains, although Soap’s attention remains solely on Honey. 

“What time does yer shift end?” He’s always dived head first for what he wants- and he is completely unashamed of how much he wants her despite not knowing she existed 15 minutes ago. 

In an instant the pleasant not-quite-flirty tone disappears as her face slips into a more neutral expression, and Soap can feel the rejection coming before she opens her mouth and he just wants to know why when she was fine bantering with him a moment ago. 

“Sorry soldier boy, I don’t mix business and pleasure.” She states simply before standing to leave. 

Well isn’t this a shit situation for him. Given he’s tethered by the needle in his arm, it’s not like he has much choice but to watch her leave (although- if he’s being completely honest it’s not like he’s really complaining about getting to watch those hips move as she walks).

It’s not even like he’s an admit, for fuck’s sake, but Soap also isn’t a feral animal who’s going to yell across the room to get a pretty girl’s attention. He’ll get an opportunity to make his case. 

“Oof, shut down,” Gaz ribs from one side, with Ghost incredulously chiming in with a “Whomp whomp,”  at how Honey had so firmly brushed him off. 

“Oh please. A’m going tae marry her.” Soap asserts wistfully. 

“I’m no expert in women, Johnny,” Ghost starts and Soap just knows he’s not going to like what comes next, “but I’m pretty sure you need to get her to agree to drinks first.”

“Fair enough, LT.”

Age in bio/pinned or I will block you ♡

[an-au-blog]

that holiday zs is coming along WAY too different than the first draft, so imma just post those initial 4k on here bc i just really dont wanna scrap them completely (the intro is kinda the same as the actual fic im posting on ao3 but yk...)

enjoy :))

(this is the actual posted one btw https://archiveofourown.org/works/61647757/chapters/157594045)

The winter months were approaching like a persistent storm, knocking on the doorstep. As vicious as both weather and time, the invites and passive-aggressive messages started again.

It was always "you have to come home for the holidays" and "if you don't come, father will be disappointed," but Sanji hated every family gathering. The fact that he was contractually obligated to go to at least one was disgusting. And even more so that Judge pulled his strings to push him into going to this Christmas party.

Just before he was about to leave his phone, adamant not to answer his sister's texts, her name was displayed again. She was calling him.

Shit... he couldn't ignore her now...

Taking a deep breath, he braced himself. "Hey, Reiju."

"Hello, Sanji." Her greeting sounded as cold as ever.

"I know what you're calling for."

"You do?" Even questions sounded closer to statements out of her lips.

"Yeah, and I'm sure you already know my answer. Did Judge put you up to this?" He never liked getting angry at her, it was not her fault, but he couldn't hide the way he felt.

"Sanji," her voice softened just a tad. "I'm sorry that our father moved the dates for the charity event, there was no way he could have known you wouldn't be in town."

"Don't lie to me. That man planned it, I know him." Sanji was itching for a cigarette. His hands trembled in fury as he opened the box and pulled one out. "He knows I wouldn't be caught dead on more than one Vinsmoke social money-parade! That charity event was the only thing I could stand by willingly and he knew that." He lit his smoke and inhaled the thick scent of it, calming. "And don't call him that, he is no father of mine. I can't recall one time where he acted like one."

"There are two years until the contract is over, please don't do anything to anger him... I don't think he actually wants to see you go."

Sanji couldn't help the sharp and humorless laugh escaping him. "As soon as my restaurant is "payed off" I can promise you, he won't be seeing any of me. It's actually funny to me how his greatest failure is his most qualified employee." 

"Sanji..."

"Whatever, I'm going." He put out his cigarette. "Not like I have any choice." The man grumbled.

"Oh, and one more thing." She paused a bit, perhaps waiting for an answer but continued before Sanji did. "It would be wise to bring a date."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

She didn't sound teasing or happy. "Just... trust me. And make it convincing."

The line went dead.

Well she never stopped being ominous

Lighting up a second cigarette, Sanji thought on what she said. Perhaps, she was right, if he took someone it could be more tolerable.

But then the problem was, who?

He couldn't take any lady, he wouldn't dare to put a woman through that torture. And it wasn't like he had a lot of friends either. Between helping at the restaurant and slaving away at the Germa company, he didn't have much time to socialize.

He needed someone who would piss off his family and would not be put off by them. He couldn't take any of the cooks... There was Luffy, but Sanji was sure he would try to kill them on sight and as satisfying as that sounded, he couldn't risk anything so close to the finish line.

After an agitatingly long consideration, Sanji took out his phone. Downloading the most popular dating app, he created a profile.

Name:

He furrowed his brows. Considering how this should be approached. Fuck it.

Name: Mr. Prince

Age: 21

Bio: I'm not here to date, I need a fake boyfriend for my annoying Christmas party. If you can hold your own and want a free meal hmu.

He considered not putting a photo, as he wasn't sure if anyone would recognize him from Judge's PR stunts. Sanji opted to taking a picture of his hand holding a cigarette. It might look edgy, it might look suspicious, but he had hit rock bottom a while ago and he was not above pulling out a pickaxe/sledgehammer. //idk which one i should put or do i put smth at all v smsl da e kato "he hit rock bottom but hes ready to go lower"

He scrolled through a couple of profiles, accepting all of them with very little ones he didn't swipe to accept, killing time until it was time yo go to the restaurant.

.

Not even ten minutes into the shift, Sanji had to turn his phone's sound and vibrations off. The constant buzzing was more irritating than Carne's unstoppable blabbering. 

Sanji's smoke break could not have come faster.

With a cigarette in hand, he held his phone in the other. Honestly, he didn't know what to expect... Dick pic, dick pic, a comment about his "slim fingers wrapped around-", alright this was disheartening. He lingered on a profile that looked a bit too suspicious - no photo of the person's face, wasn't in a single frame, just a beautiful orange cat. But reading the bio of the person, Sanji decided to keep on looking, he might be too polite for his family's prodding. 

There was another man. He looked, and Sanji was putting this lightly, like a criminal... Or a homeless criminal. Maybe he could give it a shot. He read the man's message.

Gin: I'm down if you're down ;)

Sanji knew better than to be hopeful, but giving it a shot, he typed out and clicked send.

Mr. Prince: down for what?

The ping sounded with the response of the man and it almost made Sanji's cigarette fall on the ground. He had never clicked the block button faster. What a creep.

Checking a few other profiles, he had started to get pissed off. He didn't have much more time left and he was on his third sig, one last profile and he would stop for now. His fingers were going to freeze and he was starting to worry it would snow soon. 

Zoro: will there be booze

Sanji clicked his tongue and if he wasn't searching for someone impudent, he would have blocked him just to be petty. But that was probably a good sign. Scrolling though the man's profile told him a few things. Firstly he put his full legal name, so he was either naïve or didn't care much. He hoped it was the ladder. God how he hoped. Zoro, apparently, was well built and even though it said nothing, from the few pictures, Sanji could tell that he did some kind of martial arts. If he was guessing correctly, that would be a safe bet as to where he had gotten all those scars as well, including the one on his face. And that was the other thing: he only had two pictures and both of them were clearly taken by other people. The first one was of him at a bar with two other men, the backs of their heads only visible. It was quite cinematic, enough to make Sanji a bit suspicious if it wasn't just some screenshot from an indie film or something. The second picture was of him in front of a ramen shop, he was laughing at something off screen in a relaxed manner that both exuded confidence and filled Sanji with an ache for the social life he would usually never mourn. 

Going back to the chat, he didn't give himself much time to think of a response. 

"EGGPLANT! GET YOUR ASS BACK IN HERE!" Zeff's voice echoed.

Typing out a quick response, he pocketed his phone.

"Yeah, yeah, you old geezer! Can the restaurant not burn down every time I look away?" Sanji snapped back.

Zeff laughed. "You've always been funny, little eggplant."

Sanji could hear Patty and Carne snickering. "You- " He could feel his face burning. "Stop calling me that!" Hissing out. "And you two back there better stop laughing, I am the sous-chef, I can fire you!"

"Nah, you won't." Patty smirked.

"You'll always be my little eggplant." Zeff said with a far too fond smile. Damn it old man, how could Sanji stay angry at him?

With a tisk, He rolled up his sleeves again and went back to work.

.

By the end of his shift, he felt as exhausted as ever. The cook hadn't even noticed when he reached his apartment, or his room for that matter. 

He took out his phone to set up another alarm, unsure if he would be able to wake up after his usual two.

Shit. He forgot he texted that guy.

He opened the chat.

Zoro: will there be booze

Mr. Prince: yeah, if you suffer through at least half of it

Zoro: if you dont wanna go so bad just dont

Zoro: also i hope you know ur acc looks like a bot

Zoro: still not sure its not

Damn it, he forgot to answer... At that point it was probably too late for Zoro to answer, but he had to answer now, if he didn't want to leave if for the morning in fear of forgetting again.

Mr Prince: sorry, I just got off work

Zoro: u deff don't sound like a bot atm

Mr Prince: I'm not? a bot??

Zoro: haha even ur responses look like a bot

Zoro: aight, was fun mr botman

Zoro: bye now

Mr Prince: WAIT!!!

Mr Prince: STUPID MARIMO HEAD COME BACK HERE

Mr Prince: FUCK YOUUUU

Mr Prince: GOD YOU RE SUCH A PRICK

Sanji was gripping his phone with anger. He couldn't believe this man was able to annoy him this much with so little words. If his brothers and father had anything in common with him, he would be able to get out of any conversation as long as he stuck with this man. It was a double edged sword, sure, but then again, he wouldn't have to deal with his family. He would chose any stranger over them.

He typed it something, just to delete it again. And again. Again... Damn it, the guy probably already blocked him. Or unmatched him, in any case, it wasn't like anything he wrote from then on would matter. he wouldn't see it.

Mr Prince: sorry

Before Sanji could close his phone, he saw the three dots that indicated the other was typing.

Zoro: damn ur so desperate for me

Sanji could feel his head heat up from anger and... Fuck this guy! What an asshole!

Mr Prince: I take it back.

Mr Prince: Go fuck yourself.

Zoro: no thanks

Zoro: s why i got this app

Mr Prince: ?

Zoro: idc abt relationships but being taken out and getting a good hookup after is easy here

Zoro: whatever tho

Zoro: were u srs abt the alcohol party

Mr Prince: yes

Zoro: cool

Zoro: when and where

Sanji could have gotten whiplash at how fast the conversation switched its tune, but nonetheless, he was too tired to get angrier. Needing this to end, he huffed a sigh and responded.

Mr Prince: It would be best if we meet and talk it out in person

Zoro: k

Mr Prince: Do you know Camie's Cafe? If you are free, we can go this Thursday at around 10.

Zoro: sure

Zoro: damn ur basic

Zoro: coffee date and superslims

Zoro: cant wait to see what ur hipsterass wears

Mr Prince: I am one second away from kicking your face in

Zoro: id like to see u try

Zoro: never been challenged by a failed pinterest collage

Zoro: ig theres a first for everything

The cook knew that answering would only rile him up more and encourage the man, so he ignored him instead. To make sure that he didn't put all his hopes on this overgrown house plant, he went back to looking though his other matches. Pitifully little serious ones. Half asleep he barely managed to go though them before passing out in his work clothes.

.

Thursday had come far too fast.

The snow was piling up and the little sparkling lights were being hung from traffic lights and leafless trees. Sanji looked at his phone - he was five minutes early. 

He fidgeted with his gloves before entering, nervous. 

The little bell on the top of the door rung, only making his anxiety spike even more. He scanned the tabled and felt himself able to breathe again when he didn't see the person he needed to meet. Going up to the counter, Sanji flashed a bright smile at the barista.

"Camie, my lovely flower!" He sighed theatrically. "How are you, this fine morning?" 

"Oh! Hey, Sanji, I'm doing great. Hopefully, you are too!" The girl behind the counter gave him a friendly smile.

"Ah, well, I'm great! Never been better! Even though I fear that now that I saw you, my day has reached it's peak." 

She laughed. "You say the silliest things."

His smile felt a bit less fake. Having to make a pretty lady laugh always made him feel a bit better. t least he could improve someone else's day...

"Hey, Casanova." A rude voice said behind him. "Are you gonna order or just take up the line space?" 

Sanji turned around to see some guy. He was muscular and with an ugly scowl hiding behind glasses. The man was still wearing his winter hat but had his jacket unzipped and had nothing but a tank top with a low cut underneath. 

"Eyes up here, dartbrow." He snarled.

Sanji looked behind the man, to see that there was no one else waiting. "You can shove your shitty attitude and the rest of the non-existing line up yours, cave man."

"Caveman?" He raised an eyebrow.

Damn, he looked familiar. "Yeah, one who talks big shit and wastes all my time picking fights with random people, like a prick."

"By the time it took you to flirt and throw meaning less blabber at me, you both of us would have gotten our drinks and been out of here."

"Whatever. I don't have time for idiots today." He turned to Camie, who in turn had been using the time of their bickering to make his usual drink. Bless her heart, women really were angels sent from above.

"Thank you, love." He smiled at her, leaving a big tip and the money for his order. Sitting down on a table for two, he took out his phone to text this Zoro guy. He must have been running late, because there was no one in line after the other guy and it was already five past ten.

Mr Prince: Did you arrive?

A familiar ping was heard from next to the counter. Sanji did not look up, as he saw the three dots indicating that Zoro was typing.

Zoro: Yeah

Zoro: ordering something and sitting down

Zoro: some poppas stick figure was holding up the line

Sanji froze on the spot. He was afraid to look up, but not too fond of reading the next message either. Shit... could it be? Did he actually have that much of bad luck?

Zoro: r u here btw

Zoro: ???

With great reluctance, Sanji looked up to the spot at the counter where the man was standing. He was now looking straight at him. Expression blank, just... staring.

He had taken off his glasses and hat, revealing the short green hair that was so prominent in the pictures on his profile. He looked so different when he wasn't smiling and wearing glasses or maybe it was just that Sanji had the talent to make his own life miserable...

The man typed out something on his phone, breaking eye-contact for a mere second, hitting send just to look Sanji in the eye when his phone pinged. A feral grin split his face as he approached Sanji's table.

The cook glanced down to see the notification saying "i think i c u" and cursed himself a bit.

"So what was the plan, exactly..." Zoro crossed his arms, making Sanji's eyes dart to his chest. And now that he was looking, really looking, the man was... handsome to say the least. He had a sharp jaw, he was toned and his chest was wide and muscly, squished like that it almost resembled breasts... 

"What, is this a hook up thing or are you actually a scam artist..." Zoro said again, drawing Sanji out of his daze. He was no longer smiling, genuinely pissed off.

The cook's eyes involuntarily darted to the man's chest once more, double, triple take, because damn he was big when he had his arms crossed like that.

"You got a problem with eye-contact there, buddy?" Zoro snarled once more,

If Sanji didn't feel like he had a nosebleed coming along just from looking at him, he would have jumped at the chance to fight him. But bleeding before the fight was far too humiliating. "S- sorry. It's had to- give me a second." He covered his nose and mouth with his hand and looked at anything and everything that wasn't in Zoro's direction. "It's not a "hook up thing", I actually need a fake date..." Sanji kept on looking away.

When he got no response, he dared to look at the man in front of him again. With great displeasure, he found he was giving him the most disbelieving and annoyed look known to man kind.

"Hey!" Sanji shouted. "What the hell is that look for!"

The brute rolled his eye. "This all seems like too much trouble. Why shouldn't I just leave?"

"Because you're here in the first place and if I'm right, your not the type to fo things half-assed."

Zoro smirked.

"And uh..." Sanji looked away. "It's in two days and I don't have time to look for anyone else."

Zoro's smirk disappeared. "Before I give you a yes or no, I need to see your hand."

"What!?" Sanji squeeked. Shrinking into himself as heads started tiring to them.

"Hand." Zoro extended his palm in expectation.

"This is so demeaning." Sanji sighed. He gave his left hand letting the mosshead take it. The cook wasn't sure what he expected but it wasn't to have his hand held with warm hands being turned this way and that. Despite the unhappy look on the man's face, Zoro was... surprisingly gentle.

"No."

"No?" Sanji echoed.

"The other one." He looked at the cook with such determination that it was hard to say anything in response. Speechless, Sanji placed his other hand into thw gentle, rough hands. He watched Zoro look at his hand, running his finger over the knuckle of his thumb. A small smile, barely noticeable to anyone who wasn't staring at Zoro, appeared on his face. It was such a faint thing and yet it softened the man's face, suddenly, the beautiful man in those pictures was in front of Sanji.

"Okay." Zoro hummed. He looked up at the cook again.

He was still holding Sanji's hand.

"Okay, what?" The blond pulled his hand away, regretting the loss of the other's warmth immediately. His face felt hot.

"I'll do it. Your family thing."

"Oh? Great!" Sanji beamed. "I prepared a little... uh... thing." He took out a piece of paper. "Before that, I just want to say we should probably put down some boundaries. Whatever you do is fine if it'll help with the convincing. Please do tour best not to get into any physical altercations..."

"They've said I look aggressive but-"

"No, no. It's... well, my brothers are kind of assholes to put it lightly. I really don't give a fuck how you treat them, but leave my sister out of it."

Despite the fact that Zoro's lack of reaction, Sanji decided to continue.

"I took out a few questions to make this more believable. So if we can memorize a few facts about each other-"

"What?" Zoro shot his eye to the blond.

"What."

"You want me to study for this thing? Why would I want to deal with shitty people and-"

"I'll pay you."

Zoro's eyebrow twitched ever the slightest. But Sanji knew. He was interested. Or at least that was what Sanji hoped it was.

"I can pay you if you survive at least two hours at the party. And if you don't fuck anything up for me and convince them well enough of course."

.

Zoro hummed. If it was enough to cover his debt to the witch... Damn it. He was going to do it in anyway, but this was a very welcome bonus.

"How much are we talking?" Zoro asked.

"You sound like a loan shark."

The green haired man almost chuckled at the irony.

"I'm kind of in a tight spot, myself... so how does a thousand berry sound?"

"A thousand?" Zoro raised an eyebrow.

The blond looked at him with slight disappointment at himself. "No? How about two thousand?"

Damn... Zoro never considered this guy could be rich. "And the free booze?"

"Of course."

Zoro did a half-nod. He reached over and grabbed the paper from the man's hands. "Okay, let's get this over with." He put on his glasses and squinted for a moment as he was reading. "These are some of the dumbest questions I've- what is this?" He looked up at Curlybrows with a mocking smile. "What is this, some kind of "need to know basis to know my lover" questionnaire?" He cleared his throat and started reading. "Number three - Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why? Oh. Or this one -" He pointed at the list as if the other could see what he was showing. "The eighth one: Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common." He laughed. "We just met."

The blond's face became a bright red. 

"Oh my God, it is..."

The blond snatched the list out of the green-haired man's hands and stood up. With angry and hurried movements he got dressed and left the building.

Ah. Fuck.

Zoro left his things and ran out after the man. "Hey, wait." He tried but the other seemed to ignore him. He realized he had no idea what the other other person's name was. "Prince!" He yelled, a few meters away. 

The snow was starting to pile up, lightly raining and falling on his bare shoulders. It was starting to sting a little, not that it bothered him.

"Prince, wait! Curlybrows, hold on, I'm sorry, okay-" Zoro put a hand on the other's shoulder.

In a flash of movement, unknown how, when or from where, Zoro felt something conecting with his jaw. Painful and unexpected. Zoro stumbled back, if it was him just an year ago, he would have fallen flat on his ass, whatever- whatever hit him-

He looked at the blond man in front of him - leg held in the air and a mean look.

"Fuck off!"

If it weren't all hanging on a thread, Zoro would have tried sparing with the man, but not the place or time... "Curly, look, we're not gonna get to know each other from a morning of twenty-one questions." He dusted himself off, standing up.

The silence he got as an answer was enough to make him continue.

"Clear a day and find a less crowded place and I'll tell you what you want to know." The blond opened his mouth to speakbugot cut off. "What you want to know. Not some pop quiz."

Curlybrows sealed his mouth into a thin line and huffed. "Fine." He shuffled a bit before continuing. "Go back inside before you freez to death."

"I'm fine." Zoro rolled his eye.

"Sure." A sarcastic snarl.

.

It was almost a year ago.

Zoro was used to going to Luffy's crazy parties, it was a best friend's duty to make sure he didn't break his skull. For some reason, that new year's eve party, Luffy had decided to invite everyone he knows.

It was a mess to say the least.

Zoro lost Luffy in the sea of people within the first hour. He wasn't too worried though, because as far as he heard, he was somewhere with Usopp and that man had as much self-preservation as Luffy had energy. He was at least sure that they weren't going to have to call a hospital this time.

A bit into the night, he remembered a firy ginger-haired girl who bet that she could out-drink him. She introduced herself as Nami, monopolizing the bar area. To her credit - she already seemed a bit buzzed, so when he won, he wasn't too surprised. True, it was her girlfriend, who had called it quits, but it wasn't like she would have lasted much longer anyway.

Zoro had never been a light weight, but the girl had some backbone on her and had him swaying a bit near the end of their drink-off.

He wasn't drunk. No. He could remember almost everything from that night and he had full control of his body. It was just that his brain to mouth filter was even shorter and his reactions seemed slightly slower.

Nonetheless, it was fine.

It was more than fine because that night was about to become the most amazing night in his life.

Umsure of where he was going, Zoro walked around the house, looking for Luffy. There was no sight of him in the past hour or so and it starting to worry the man.

He stood in the midst of one of the larger rooms, looking around. He felt someone bump into him. By the time he had to turn around and see who it was, Zoro barely managed to dodge a knee to his stomach.

There was a blond man in front of him, the most vibrant blue eyes and soft-looking lips, redness in his cheeks and a heaviness in his eyelids - he was clearly drunk. And yet, the blond looked ready to murder him. What a sight.

"Watch where're goin'... " The man slurred his speech.

Zoro didn't have the time to say anything before someone else bumped into them, causing the fall of a plate that Zoro hadn't noticed im the other's hands.

The blond looked down at the fallen food, his eyes quickly becoming red and wet with unshed tears. "Who's gonna eat my cooking now?" He sniffled. " 's all y'ur fault!" He poked at Zoro.

Not minding the comment, Zoro grabbed the plate and knelt down and started collecting the dropped food off the ground. It looked like some kind of pastrie. One of it was stepped on, chocolate spilling from it's side.

When Zoro stood up again, he pretended not to notice that he was being tracked by the bright blue eyes. The blond man reached out to take the plate but stopped when he saw Zoro grabbing a handfull of the pasties and starting to eat them. Not leaving one on the plate, Zoro expected to get scolded for eating dirty food, or maybe the man was drunk enough to get mad for having his food eaten.

But no, he was just watching the other with wide eyes.

"I wanna kiss you..." The blond said, barely above a whisper.

And since his body seemed to move faster than his brain, "You're beautiful" was all Zoro could say in response.

"I'm really tired." After a small pause. "How was it?"

"Delicious. I hate chocolate." Before the blond could comprehend thw comment, Zoro continued. "You made those?"

"Yeah." He nodded. Adorable. " 'm a chef!"

"No wonder you're Luffy's friend." Zoro laughed.

"Imma get my own rest'rant soon!" His eyes sparked. " 's gonna be big an' blue, an' we'll never leave anyone hungry."

Zoro raised an eyebrow, apparently an indication for the other to continue. Small side steps out of the way of one or another person had them somehow on one of the couches. The blond leaning in, enthusiastically talking about cooking with a passion that filled Zoro with warmth he hadn't felt in a while. Even though the drowsiness and fatigue of the night, the man carried on with the intricacies of each dish, product or cooking utensil.

Half-asleep on Zoro's chest, still talking, letting the green-haired man pay with his right hand. Commiting to memory every little cut and mole - like the one on his thumb, or the little calluses on his fingers from holding a knife for hours on end.

When he looked out to see there was snow piling, he couldn't care for it much. He'd never felt warmer.

In the morning, Zoro had gotten up to roam about the house in search of something to drink. One of the things he regretted most. The next thing he knew, he was coming back to an empty couch and Luffy - stuffing his face with eggs that smelled far too amazing to be made by him.

"Luffy, where did the blond cook go?"

Still chewing, Luffy grinned. " 'oro! 'Anji 'e't 'or 'ork."

He left for work?

Zoro had been resigned to the thought of never seeing him again. All until he saw a familiar looking hand on an app he hadn't used in months. But it couldn't be him, right? That would be too good to be true.

[marvelous-llama]

BTS recs

<<original book

most of the mentioned works is 18+ NSFW, MINORS DNI

pls don´t hesitate to hmu, if any of mentioned links doesn´t work or you have suggestions for more fics... thank you so much for all the love and comments

one shots

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Kissing In The Moonlight by @apotatomashedbybts

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unspoken by @jeonverselol

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happy birthday loser by @jungk0oksthighs

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hurts so good by @jjkeverlast

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There´s No Way by @redjoonie

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series

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regroup by @drvmekoo

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Call Me by @peachypinkygloss

Jungkook x fem!reader strangers > fwb > lovers, rich reader, summer break AU - angst, hurt/comfort, smut, fluff Summer break is always your favourite period of the year, enjoying the fresh water of the pool and the sun kissing your skin. Everything's going great until a sudden boy appears in your life and becomes the centre of your world.

colour me in by @taegularities

Jungkook x fem!reader fake dating, fwb, university AU - fluff, angst, smut Jungkook's door only opens for you when there's a barter: a trade of lust and haze. But today you knock for something more, as intriguing as it is frightening – and you hope it doesn't close his door forever.

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[fairfoxie]

btw my take on the animal packer controversy is why would I care what fucking packer people use? How would it affect my life in any capacity?? I support any kind of affirming gear anyone chooses to wear for any reason because it has exactly 0 impact on my life!!!

"Oh but they're being sold to minors" so??? Newsflash but minors have genitals too, and they also experience dysphoria and they also deserve species/gender affirming gear w/o question. Minors already wear packers btw. Once again why would I care or even know what packer anyone chooses to wear??? I would have been PISSED if I had no access to binders as a minor and I don't see how this is any different.

Anyway if anyone ever comes out with a binder that gives you chest floof... hmu 👀

[yakuzabrainrotlive]

I have had NO time to play lately fr. And when I have played, I've been growing Ichiban's social network, picking stuff off the ground and taking pictures. AND killing hundreds of evil santas at the mall because their money yield levels are nuts and I want good gear.

But. I HAVE also made progress with the main plot too. And have had time to... process it a bit.

Yeah, I got to The Reveal :) I am Suffering :) Got to the beginning of chapter 5.

So. What witty lil' thing am I supposed to say here? Like... fuck. Just. Fuck. It shattered my heart to see him break the news with this smile I can't interpret. I mostly see a man who's accepted his fate and made his peace with it, which would be in-character considering... well... *gestures at this man's entire life and then the way he was in Gaiden*. I feel like I'm sadder and more bitter than Kiryu himself is about the whole situation. Or maybe he's just hiding his true feelings very well.

I hate the fact that Kiryu's disadvantaged position in society as an orphan keeps hurting him even this late in life. It feels so unfair, it hurts, it's... incredible writing.

....yeah. Not even remotely surprised. This is just Kiryu in a nutshell. Always looking for people in need of help, a job that needs to be done, a cog he can help turn. He's always looking for a purpose; something to keep him going. And while that's something most people want, I feel like Kiryu is always living to be able to benefit other people. Very noble, but not healthy.

The start of Y3 felt like the closest we'll ever get to him properly settling down and BREATHING for once. I can never go back to that game without breaking down, huh.

THANK YOUUUU ICHIBAN WE'LL BE DOING EXACTLY THAT ❤️ we'll drag that old man into the hospital kicking and screaming if we have to ❤️❤️

Ichiban's overall reaction to the reveal surprised me. I know he's VERY compassionate and caring, but he felt so genuinely distressed it was almost shocking to me. I know they had like... mutual respect and trust going on in LAD, but I didn't get the vibe that they were THIS close. Maybe I have to go back to their shared cutscenes from LAD again. Or maybe Ichiban just feels that strongly, especially after this brief... thing they've had here in Hawaii. Nothing wrong with that at all. We love and respect Ichiban in this house.

Ichiban and Tomizawa... hmu. I will give you soup and warm cinnamon rolls. No questions asked, no need to pay.

Kiryu... please, for the LOVE OF GOD, let them help you. Let someone help you. No, don't just let them help you help others, LEAN ON THEM.

Love to see how effectively Ichiban brings out the sass in Kiryu. This dynamic is peak. They're so silly together.

*banging on my apartment walls* LET ME OUT!! LET ME OUT OF HERE!! PLEASE!! HAVE MERCY 😭😭 I don't wanna see Kiryu like this!! I'm gonna throw up!!

We're in chapter 4 and I wanna crawl into a hole to cry. I am NOT going to survive this game.

:)

ANYWAY YAYYYY!! New party member ^_^ she's SOOO cool, she's STAYING.

Okay so I already kinda have a team I really like and everyone works well together?? How the hell am I supposed to pick 3 people when the old squad (besides Eri, RIP my MVP queen 😔) is definitely coming back as well? Tomizawa and Chitose have grown on me so I don't wanna bench 'em, and I will literally be 6 feet under before Kiryu even looks at the bench, so... I'm in trouble 😭

I'm gonna have to see if Tomizawa and Chitose can be built around Ichiban and Kiryu, or if others will fill roles better. If anything's gonna make me bench 'em, it's going to be my hyper-optimizing, excel-sheet making brain that loves to make my teams as BROKEN balanced as possible.

OKAY ALSO. That better not have been it for the Barracudas. Like, for real. They were portrayed as SOOO spooky and dangerous and they honestly felt like The Threat to me. Are they really folding this early? I hope not.

THE SQUAD HAS ASSEMBLED! So pleased to have a full team ^_^

[elvenbeard]

Long rambly headcanon post about Kerry's sexuality incoming (because I have been thinking about this ever since I first met him in game and I wanna write it down somehwere).

Disclaimer: this is my personal headcanon. You don't have to agree with any of this, this is for fun and games. If you do happen to agree with this though hmu bc I need someone to talk Kerry with desperately xDD

So, first of all: I think Kerry himself doesn't give a fuck about labels. Too old for this shit, confident in his own sexuality, what difference does it make? Labels are great for those who need them, he's not against them at all, but I don't think it's something that's he's thinking about a lot. Is he gonna put on a rainbow shirt for Pride? Yeah why not, especially if his partner would like to go protest and celebrate togther. But I think it's not a top priority of his (at least not anymore, in 2077, at the ripe old age of 89. A young Kerry living in our times was probably louder and a lot more outspoken, but in this post I'm gonna talk about my thoughts on grandpa Kerry).

So, let's dive into the game. When the topic of Louise came up during my first playthrough (the first and only time sadly, I'd love to know more about her as a character - more headcanons incoming in a minute), internally I went like... what? Where does this come from? Not in a judgemental way, just honest surprise, because up until this point, Kerry had only been depicted as attracted to guys (making the saddest puppy eyes at Johnny, making out with a fan backstage, Johnny's various comments on him, their sexual-tension-filled relationship with each other). Beyond that, what we know from Kerry himself, he seemed to have tried to get something going with Ariel (who I think is a man - correct me if I'm wrong, it's been a while since I played the actual conversation between him and Johnny at the villa and I'm not sure if he mentions Ariel's gender there). In the Temperance ending, if V was in a relationship with Kerry, Kerry will recount his other shitty exes of which at least one was also a man, and in the Sun ending, when his (male) manager calls, V can ask if that is "an ex of [his]".

That being said... yeah, Kerry flirts with V regardless of gender. Why? Maybe he doesn't know that himself, maybe he thinks V is cute, maybe it's a power play, maybe he just wants to annoy Johnny who cannot escape the situation, who knows, anything goes. His whole rockstar persona is this carefree, laidback sexgod thing, of course he's gonna be flirty. He is flirty with the Us Cracks girls, too (at least I'm getting the impression - they definitely are flirty with him and he doesn't mind, but it could also all be part of the show). So me personally, yeah, I think Kerry is bisexual, but with a strong preference for guys (sincerely, me, a bisexual who also has a preference for guys). Maybe Louise was his bisexual awakening, or a once-in-a-lifetime thing that never happened again with any other woman, or a mix of both. See also: Kerry turns a female-presenting V down when things get serious. Flirting is fun, she is nice and kind and into it, so why the hell not? But he's not gonna lead her on when he notices she wants more than what he's willing to give. Friends can flirt with each other without it turning romantic or sexual. And yeah, I think Kerry is generally attracted to people regardless of what's in their pants, but as soon as things get serious he is infinitely more likely to go for a guy than for a woman.

That being said (and now we're back at Louise), I think it's absolutely fair to headcanon him as gay, too. There is so little we know about the nature of his only (canonically depicted, spelled-out "that's my ex-wife" style) long-term relationship with a woman. This is the dark future, where you can genetically engineer your child to look however you want it to look. Maybe Kerry and Louise were just two sad and lonely individuals that were like "let's raise kids together to fill the void in our hearts!" - and, using Kerry's words, that went as well as you'd expect it. Could be that Louise is a lesbian who wanted a family and kids, and Kerry, being a close friend of hers, said yeah let's do it (and maybe I won't be so fucking lonely anymore and find a new purpose in being a father)! And for reason xyz it was easier to raise the kids if they were also married (something something about getting married to be allowed to have kids - I etiher heard or read something in game once about a 1-child-license or something, again, dark future fuckery could be involved here). Also, historically, there are certainly countless examples of queer men marrying queer women to get their conservative families off their backs. With how little we know about Louise, not even how old she was when they got together, it could also be something like that. And (turning back now to Kerry's flirty behaviour around women when someone else is watching) everything else could have been part of the show - for families, for the media, for the public, for the fans, everything goes.

What I'm trying to say, there's hundreds of ways to headcanon a fictional character's sexuality. Maybe Louise and Kerry were friends with benefits, maybe they fell madly in love, maybe there's more women in Kerry's past than what the game depicts (there's countless women's clothing items across his villa - that could be anything from leftovers of wild parties in which he wasn't involved to him taking home groupies and everything beyond that and inbetween).

You could also just say "Kerry is gay cause I say so, that's as deep as it gets" and that is just as valid. Don't be like me and spend your sleepless nights thinking about this because my brain works in mysterious ways. If you wanna headcanon him as gay because it brings you comfort, wholeheartedly, go for it. If you wanna heacanon him as not turning down your female V because it brings you comfort, go for it, by all means! If you wanna headcanon him as cis, trans, everything inbetween, hell yes, be my guest!!

Kerry is a fictional character, he's not gonna be offended or hurt. And every real person who gets upset about how someone else likes to play with their favourite pixel ken doll then, well... touch some grass @ that person. Headcanons do not take away representation from marginalized groups. Block and blacklist what you don't wanna see and move on, it's so easy (and on that note, anyone who wants to be weird or hateful on this post is gonna get blocked, too xD).

As I said, this is all my thoughts and opinions, if you don't agree, that's fair, I get it, I don't agree with 80% of headcanons I come across (not even just regarding a characters sexuality, but in general). But yeh I'd also love to talk if you have similar views on him!

On that note... happy pride xD🏳️‍🌈 be kind to each other!

[solarsleepless]

hello. 🧍

do you have any power ranger fic recs? doesn’t have to be trimberly, but i’m kinda in deep about them 😶

OH BOY DO I.

warning: they're all trimberly

"we gladiate but i guess we're really fighting ourselves" by sunnydalehart: a LOOONG fic that plays the idea of what the sequel would be REALLY well. i ADORE this person's tommy. also also it's one of the funniest fics i've ever fucking read you WILL be laughing at all the chatfic moments. a tw for a bit of homophobia in it and canon typical violence ofc

"the art of silence and pretty girls" by lyctors. i'll admit i haven't read this one in a WHILE so idk the plot fully but just trust me bro it's a good read

"truth will out (you)" by andawaywego. trimberly outsiders pov fic. nuff said.

"drown with me" by BerryliciousCheerio. trini angst from kim's pov!!!

"Lessons in listening to your heart, not your head" by tigermochaeyu: a soft fic of different situations where kim Feels so much for trini <3

"Open Your Eyes and See What's Been There All Along" by RealistTrash aka one of the BEST fics i have EVER read i love it sm. soulmates au AND no powers au!

"(don't ask why) I can paint a picture of you in my mind" by crosshatches, another fucking BRILLIANT fic where trini is very gay and very oblivious. another favourite <3

"Falling Like Icarus (I Have Burned For My Love)" by TaikoTurtle. kim being a bi mess and also being jelly. chapter 1 is yearning and chapter 2 is yearning too but Now With Really Well Written Jealousy Angst. <3

pink lemonade is a series, again by BerryliciousCheerio! i highly recommend this, it captures their voices REALLY well and manages to mix heavy angst with fluff wonderfully. heads up, it gets pretty heavy in some places

i have more but it's getting pretty late. hmu tmrw if you want more!

[ultfan]

anonymous sent in the best ask i've ever received: When it comes to sex, does his luck/bad luck come into factor at times?

anon thank you so much for making me think about this because it isn't smthn i've considered much — but it definitely would come into play at times. my god. it effects every part of his life, sex should 100% be included. i doubt it happens every time, komaeda's luck isn't something that is always attacking/blessing him constantly. it has it's major highs and major lows. i honestly think the reason komaeda had so many things go his way during dr2 is because he was already in an extremely unlucky situation. — as a reversal of that i wonder if komaeda at hopes peak had a buncha mini fumbles with bad luck, since getting into the school was such a great thing for him. but that's for a different ramble.

yeah ——— i imagine it does come into effect at times. especially when strong feelings are involved. i think neutral flings are kinda a gray area for his luck. he might get passively "lucky" finding things that his partner really enjoys, but i think that's more his skills of observation and general knowledge of the human body at work rather than true luck. on the "bad luck" but not really end for these kinda flings (again, more of a gray area) he's likely to exhaust himself pretty quickly. he is not someone who can exert himself physically for a while. hence why he tends to bottom/be submissive even though he does really enjoy topping/being dominate. again though, not really the place for those wild swings of good/bad luck. in general they're probably just decent experiences for him.

for example... say komaeda is really happy in a relationship. he's feeling so so fortunate and lucky and he's finally able to be intimate with his partner. erectile dysfunction. premature ejaculation. the bed fucking breaks. a stray baseball flys through the window and hits his partner in the face. it just goes wrong — embarrasses the fuck out of him. possibly even frustrates his partner. — if it's extreme levels of bad luck there could be a really shitty instance of something killing his partner during/before/after. or maybe his partner turns out to be really bad at sex!!! or he learns something about them that makes him want to break off the relationship immediately.

but say... if he's together with one of the despairs — be it junko or otherwise — someone he's physically attracted to but hates/has mixed feelings on... god is it the best sex he's ever had. and it's so fucking infuriating. he's able to push through and get extra bursts of stamina to keep it up longer. oh? looks like there's a box of brand new sex toys under the bed in this abandoned house we're banging in! having sex in public in the riskiest place ever and somehow not getting caught. or... they do get caught, if that's what he wants. not that he's much of an exhibitionist, i don't really think he cares if people see him nude.

now i really wanna write threads where komaeda's luck just makes a sexual situation really fucking comedically bad (or comedically good). that'd be so silly. who's gonna hmu?

[smoshidiot]

fuck it, since it's my own ask game, i'm gonna answer all of them

Ian or Anthony? - Ian. But I love Anthony dearly and they both make me so happy <3

When did you start watching Smosh? - 2012. Was SUPER obsessed for a few years. Kinda fell off when Anthony left, very excited to be back.

What's your favorite channel between main/pit/games? - Gotta be main channel because nostalgia counts for a lot for me

Who is your favorite castmember? - Besides Ian and Anthony, Shayne ♡ (ily Noah and Courtney tho mwah)

Do you have a favorite Smosh video? What is it? - Paranormal Easy Bake Oven!

Fave classic Smosh character? - I mean .. c'mon. Gotta give love to Boxman

What is your favorite series on Smosh (main channel)? - tbhh. Food Battle.

What is your favorite series on Smosh Pit? - rn it's the reddit stories they're so fun

What is your favorite series on Smosh Games? - I don't have a better answer but remember the series "I have a raging bonus"? yeah ..

Fave Smosh song? - The Legend of Zelda rap my beloved

What's something you want to see come back? - I'd love a food battle 2023 if I'm totally honest. also just music in general

Do you own any Smosh merch? - i USED to own the legend of smosh green hoodie but had to throw it out after wearing it for half a decade. just ordered my reunion shirt tho

Do you ship anything/love any friendship pairs? - I used to be a hardcore cringe ianthony shipper. I still adore their friendship and god they mean a lot to me. also .... shaynoah

What is your favorite 'era' of Smosh? - i'm really excited for this upcoming era tbhh. but also 2012-2014ish slapped

What castmember do you think you are most like? - Arasha tbh she's such a damn mood sometimes

Have you met any friends through Smosh? - Hmm not particularly, but I definitely had friends in middle school that i forced to watch smosh and an irl friend that i still have today that used to watch them

What do you want to see now that Anthony's back? - As said above, I'd rly love music videos with the duo again. But also I'm excited to see Anthony get put onto all of the pit/games series

What is your fave Smosh meme/inside joke? - my donkey is river waffle big sausage fat (a classic, really)

Is there a video/series you really loved when you were younger? - lunchtime with smosh was one of my all-time faves

Do you have a crush on anyone at Smosh? - Shayne Topp hmu is all I'm gonna say

Did you ever watch Smosh the movie? - of course I did. I still own the DVD somewhere .. no i cannot remember a single thing that happened in it

Simply post a screenshot/moment/reaction that you love. - I'll post one at the bottom of the questions bc tumblr is dumb abt formatting

Tell me an unpopular Smosh opinion. - tbh i straight up can't watch eat it or yeet it, it's too gross for me

Tell me about a Smosh memory you hold dear. - when I met Smosh Games at a comic con in 2014(? i think it was). It was the OG crew + Wes it was amazing they were all so sweet and I remember Wes complimenting my costume and asking me what my fave thing from the series was. Joven signed my sketchbook

It's food battle time. You picking a pink frosted sprinkled donut, or some stick-shaped food? - Always go for that pink frosted sprinkled donut babey!!

oh and here's my fave random screenshot btw:

[tastygoldentaters]

31, 32 & 33

Ah, it's my favourite social enrichment partner~

31. If you could only play one game for the rest of your life, what would it be?

Probably The Sims 3. I am very autistic about it, I've taught myself how to create mods and textures and meshes just to make my game exactly how I want it to be, optimized the settings for greater performance and gameplay, learned and created whole worlds with lore and characters, if there's only one game I can play it has to be The Sims 3.

32. Have you ever rage quit a game? If so, what game and what caused the rage quit?

The Sims 3 again. As much as I love the game, the code and optimization are fucking awful and it crashes for the most stupid reasons, sometimes for no reason at all. I've ragequit a few times because it crashed while I was fucking SAVING THE GAME in order to prevent losing progress in the event of a crash...

33. Most embarrassing gaming moment.

I was playing Don't Starve Together with a buddy. It's a survival game, and this friend and I had built a cozy camp with a little farm and an orchard for easy access to food and firewood because, you know, survival game. Thing is, the character I was playing with is a pyromaniac, and has a lighter. I was distracted and started walking around with the lighter on, setting our farm and orchard on fire. It was a few years ago, but this friend is yet to let me live this down.

(if any mutuals want to play either Don't Starve Together or Project Zomboid with me, just hmu!)

send me a gaming related question!

[2ndeve]

let's gaurrr same girl same deal it's just blue again with shin jieum, nothing has changed so tbh if you've read this intro before u don't need to read it again! still a sadpathetic girl looking to exchange a plot of land for just a bit ( a lot ) of the love or power she thinks she deserves ! profile, background pages are here & more info / plots under the cut, like this or just hmu i’ll be there! 💗

info

unknown / nth was on loop while writing her bio, though i think that's more indulgent for her than the sharp objects jieum's actually made out of rip but that's on context & for listening!

starting from the bottom: the shins are a family that somehow manages to weasel their way to capitalise on whoever's in power at the time ( usually the parks ). have an unfortunate tendency to angle for their daughters marrying into the founding families—though they can't be said to be unsuccessful on that front!

so that's how jieum is raised! mother is sour from losing out on the yang heir of her time & is now puppeteering her children into where she almost was. she lied to jieum that she's a yang-affair baby & insists that she's lost out, so she's got a big chip on her shoulder about not having what she's due

( would fuck her up to find out that she's actually just the daughter of a mediocre man but she doesn't know that. yet! )

but anyway jieum is not the alluring type :( she fades into the background, v much unperks of being a wallflower. not rlly charismatic or sweet enough to win any hearts & doesn't have the backbone to stand taller than kim i or yang on her own either so she's kind of fucked she's always 2nd yknow bridesmaid but never the bride until!!!!

she Does become the bride. hot damn!

she thinks she's finally getting her flowers, but this marriage is loveless & faithless so eventually ( quite quickly ) falls apart. her ego is her undoing and she turns cold & dry to park i, which only makes things worse, rip—she's defo keeping up the facade of a perfect home but it's not that at all

tries to soothe her ego by reminding herself of all the people she's better than now that she's married into the parks! has defo stepped on a few toes for her ego's sake but she has old habits of deferring to people & also needs her father in law's help re the land so she can't be Too uppity?

let's go horoscope girlies she's got a pisces sun aries moon taurus rising, she longs for love & loves herself too much but it's not enough for her... she might think she's playing the game well but it's usually clouded by her ego / insecurities. makes missteps all the time bc she's not used to being on the upper hand or needing to be careful since being 2nd means no one rlly notices u. feels sorry for herself all the time & can be kind but only when it makes her feel better about herself. also she's so bored & discontent with life she's just a housewife but who knows if she'll still be when she starts shilling for tk group!

plots

fellow stiffed by life sufferers. people who are willing to commiserate about how bad their lives are even tho objectively none of them are having it that bad

the first / only person she's ever come first to & like sure they aren't important or powerful but they make her feel powerful so maybe she's attached but sneakily. maybe she doesn't want to be associated w them too publicly?

a friend her friend they're hers & she might have smth codependent with them

someone who thinks she's so pathetic but she's like trainwreck entertainment for them they keep leading her down the wrong paths

or maybe someone who feels bad for her. they keep trying to help her & she keeps getting mad at them for meddling even tho they mean well & she Knows they mean well but her ego is small & easily bruised

people who don't like park i & the wife of my enemy is my enemy—but if she doesn't like him too then is she ur friend?

someone who smells a rat when she's around & repeating jung / iida's talking points about selling the land...

also someone who might believe her & legit thinks the shins have the good of the town at heart she's working an angle on them now

the usu yknow childhood friends rivals exes fwbs ( yes she's married but if he's cheating so is she... )